Why do we sometimes wait for the approval of others, rather than trusting in our own opinion of ourselves?
I have developed a thick skin over the years, not because I have always been confident, but because I came to a realisation. It became clear to me, when I really thought about it, that the only people’s opinions that I actually care about are my close friends and family.
I used to care about what people around me would think of what I looked like or would judge me by my actions, and then I realised – why do I care about the opinion of someone I don’t even know? I’m never going to see these people again and worrying what these people thought was actually exhausting!
It made me feel more free! If I was out and being extroverted, which I am, then the chances are, my friends would be doing the same thing too!
Don’t get me wrong, there are lots of times when the opinions of others when giving constructive feedback are really important if you want to grow and develop as a person. Without failure and learning from it, it is not possible to be successful and if someone can help you by advising you how to improve or move forward, then their words are important.
Self-Worth Comes From You
But, if we base our self esteem on the opinions of others, we will live a very miserable life! You cannot wait for someone to give their good opinion of you so that you can feel good about yourself – because honestly, it might never come.
You can’t be liked by everyone and you can’t let others’ opinions of you dictate how you see youself. You need to be comfortable with yourself, you have to accept the good, the bad and the ugly and be comfortable that we are not perfect and never will be.